Thursday, April 28, 2005


For all of those who have sacrificed for what they believe in....

Dereliction of "morality"
Ignoring my mortality
Evading the reality
I simply continued on.

As the leadership preached,
The boundaries I reached
The laws at hand I breached,
And simply continued on.

Others with me united,
Our energy ignited
The goal would not be blighted,
We simply continued on.

Planning every detail
We knew we would prevail
This they could not curtail
Because we continued on.

Thus began the fight
As we battled into the night
Our enemies took flight
And we continued on.

Soon fell the czar,
Liberty was ours
Proudly displaying our scars
We can now continue on.

Copyright 2005 © by Heather Sawyer All Rights Reserved

Saturday, April 23, 2005


The mirror cracks....innocence gone,
Not out of shelter but out of a home.
Child born, apron strings tugged,
Meeting a man, pretend to make love.

Womb grows, another is born,
Marry for guilt, this woman forlorn.
Second child is dead, buried and gone
The man decides its time to move on.

Another man comes, sweeps the woman away
Onto a new city, begin a new day.
Breakdown occurs, nasty memories remain
Marry for love, not a dime to their names.

Fertility tries, a child is born,
Elated and scared, trying to move on.
A career begins, life is as planned,
A heart attack comes and threatens the man.

Proclaiming "Onward!" to a new city they go
The middle of nowhere, they play in the snow.
Enjoying the life, thus ending the career
Will breaking the mirror last only 7 years?

Copyright 2005 © by Heather Sawyer All Rights Reserved

Loving Gabriella

As my skin twists under the diamond cut blade
The crimson streaks of hurt flow away
And I realize how good this pain can feel
When the emotional scars can't seem to heal.

Distracted and numb I remained for a year
Before the intense pain began with a tear.
So much grief, each word of strife
Would I ever regain a love for life?

Or would I remain in desperate search
For existence that continues beyond the earth?
"Move on," they say. "You're young, have more."
Or the worst - only silence- these people I abhor.

For how can they know the wretched insides
Of a heartbroken mother whose daughter has died.
I am scarred, destroyed, confused, and dead
Wishing she hadn't slept in that condemned bed.

As I try to recall the good times we shared
I am flooded with images of finding her there.
Her lifeless body - eyes closed, arm raised;
Breathing into the nose - and I even prayed.

"Whoever, Whatever, is someone there?
Poor choices I've made of this I am aware.
But please, don't take her, she's done nothing wrong.
If it's retribution you seek take me, her mom.

But whoever, whatever may have been there
Was not listening to me, or simply didn't care.
I pumped her chest with desperate hope in my heart;
The medics arrived to do their part.

They cut her clothes in half like a rag,
Put wires to her chest, reached for a bag.
"Stop!" said one as he touched the other's arm,
"There's nothing we can do, she's definitely gone."

It's memories like these keeping me up at night
Nauseating visions tell me to quit the fight.
When she died, I died as well
And was forced into rebirth - or is this hell?

I know in my heart I must go on.
There are two beautiful boys that need their mom.
But I am not tough, I am not strong -
I am simply hiding the pain which shall never be gone.

So now and then I need the release
To let the blood flow, make the intensity cease.
The scars on my body will glow and not hide
While the destroyed woman lingers inside.

And on occasion she will come out and cry.....

Never forgetting the child that died.

In memory of Gabriella Heather Robinson
October 29, 1997 - September 16, 1998

Copyright 2005 © by Heather Sawyer All Rights Reserved